I just want to run away. I don't feel good with myself. I don't love me. They don't love me either.
How did I think that he felt something for me in somewhere of his heart? It was impossible. Really, I carry the prize to the most stupid woman!
The worst of all was that he wasn't ashamed, he didn't hate me. Simply, he didn't care anything about me.
He saw me like a fool, like a poor girl. And it is the truth. I just wanted to be nice to him. I just wanted him to like me. And even so, he didn't love me.
How stupid I was! His kisses made me going crazy. Why didn't he love me? Why didn't he fall in love with me as I did with him?  What do I have to change to get the love of somebody? Am I so horrible? I just want to change. It seems like it's the only way to get someone's love. I am exhausted because I never get what I want. Nobody will love me if I don't love myself first. But It is a little hard. When I remember my whole life, I realize that I've always gone wrong. None of my lovers love me ever. They didn't look at me because they didn't want anything with me, an It is still happening.
I just want to cry. Why anybody loves me? Help me somebody. I just want to feel loved.
I AM POIGNANTLY.